Why Jazz Music is Inferior to Real Music
October 7, 2009Toad 2 Comments »Ever listen to Jazz music? I sure hope not because Jazz music blows.
It is a universal fact that musicians can do whatever the hell they want and they generally do when they are off stage. But when onstage there is a script that every act must follow including the following bits.
- Crowd participation - I understand it’s harder to have crowd participation when you don’t have a crowd, but even Mozart has parts where the audience has to stand up and do the wave.
- Starting the actual show late. hours late. – Sure it takes time to get everything out on the set and clear out the crappy opening band’s junk but it is customary to wait at least half an hour before bringing out the feature act. When it comes to Jazz, the show starts on time and there is no follow up to the crappy opening band.
- Musical Structure - Most musical groups and composers like to make songs that build up. Something like a three-act structure in a movie, book, or (god forbid) even a play. With Jazz, they make things up on the spot and nobody knows what the hell is going on. It’s like listening to Mike talk.
- Fake Ending - Every single concert ever has a fake ending. The band plays like five songs and then leaves just knowing there is going to be an encore. Why wouldn’t there be one? You just payed 36 bucks to get in and so far its over seven bucks a song. But when it comes to Jazz, everybody leaves! so who knows if the ending is fake or not!
Sure you can listen to whatever you want and I’m not going to stop you. Unless we’re in the same car and your music sucks. Other than that caveat, you can listen to all the bad music you want. Just keep in mind that you’re wasting time with ADD powered Jazz music.
And if you still think you like Jazz, try listening to some.
October 12th, 2009 at 8:41 am
Fantastic… now people think my conversations are as bad as jazz… we all know only Legally Blonde 2 is as bad as jazz
October 12th, 2009 at 5:04 pm
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